Develop a rhythm that is right for you and your community

Starting a community is overwhelming.

Think of how it feels for you, as the builder or founder. So many things to think about! So many things to do! So many dots to connect! Sometimes it makes my mind melt.

So, here's the thing...if it makes your mind melt, how is the community going to feel? Your community is learning new habits and routines as well, it can feel like a lot.

It's so easy to overthink things. To think that we need all the features. That we need activity every single day. To feel like a failure if people aren't showing on their own accord.

Of course, your community may need many of these things, but most likely not all of them. And you most definitely don't need them to start with.

Developing a rhythm is key to creating consistency

If we take a look at perhaps the most well-known communities in the world β€” many tend to revolve directly around religion. Admittedly, I'm not religious at all, so hopefully I won't come across as uneducated. I do remember my grandmother walking to church every day. Now, most people don't do that. Perhaps they just go on a Sunday. Or just once a year for Christmas. For Muslims, it's Fridays that is the day of worship, then also an intense month of Ramadan.

What is important is that these communities have rhythms, evolved around things like activities, conversations, and rituals.

Now, when it comes to building community these days we are put under so much pressure to have constant activity. We want people to be present, constantly. If they are not, we are deemed failures. This is really an unhealthy approach to community building.

As community builders and leaders, we're also responsible for setting the pace β€” how does your onboarding process, rituals, or activities make people feel?Providing pace is a good thing.

People are the heart of community

At the center of communities are the people. Their needs should come first. To expect and put pressure on people to constantly show up is unfair to them, and this has only been massively amplified by Covid.

Community should be about being for the people when they need it. Not when you do.

Let's stop the meeting or gathering for the sake of meeting or gathering, and make sure that we're intentional with what we create and how we're creating it.

What if you can get as much value as a community by showing up together once a month? Instead of daily conversations?

What if an audio conversation is all that is needed?

Or a collaboration around a Google Doc?

What if people just wanted to talk to others once in a while?

Creating rhythms, rituals and conversations with empathy, kindness, and people in mind

No matter what, it's easy to get caught up in the process, the routine, or the daydreams and visions of what your community could be. Β This can cause us to succumb to pressure and center ourself. Β As we chatted about during the RosielandHQ cohort β€” community is about how you can create opportunities to pass the mic.

Consider this your permission slip, no your prescription, to take a day off. Pass the mic. Ask someone else to take the reins, be transparent with your community and where its at, be transparent with your community and where you're at.

Now I'm not advising you to to chill in a lounge chair all day sipping cocktails and just hoping the community will handle it, but rather building rhythms and rituals that keep not only the community at a sustainable pace, but also yourself.

How can you design these community rhythms?

The classic advice is to start small and build upon it. A lot of community building is about habits. You have to build good habits not only for yourself, but also for your community. This habit building is why community is so hard. Rewiring how people live their lives is hard work!

Ever have the friend (or been the friend) who starts their fitness routine with an intense workout, never to be seen again β€” the routine wasn't sustainable. When you don't think sustainably you're more likely to crash and burnout.

Listening is key here β€” make sure that you're creating rhythms that fit within the community member's descriptions as well. Β Depending on the type of community you have bandwidth could look different. Β A community of working moms is going to look different than a community of college students, is going to look different than a running group. Β Match your rituals to your members needs and interests.

Here's some basic community rhythms to start with β€” start small then once you've got one down as a habit, go from there:

  • Introduce yourself to everyone in the community as they join
  • Share your community members wins
  • Have a call with a community member once weekly
  • Build routines - weekly checkin, accountability sessions
  • Look at low-lift ways to collaborate β€” coauthor something, invite on a podcast, jam on a google doc, start a twitter thread
  • Tell someone they're appreciated β€” reply to a newsletter, share a tweet, give feedback,

While these individual habits seem small β€” they really do add up. Β Block time off in your calendar to do so β€” whether it's a community checkin hour blocked off, or simply a way of bundling habits a la James Clear.

  • When I... read a newsletter, I will then... reply to it to share my joy of it.
  • When I... see someone join, I will then... message them and see how they're doing.
  • When I... see someone achieve something big, I will then... celebrate their win by sharing it (when appropriate!)

Remember, its not a sprint, or even a marathon. Β  Community is about conversations and relationships.

Be a kind human first and foremost β€” and show that kindness to yourself.

So tell me, what community habits have you developed?

How can we build better communities?

We are on a quest to learn and explore what makes great communities.

Rosieland

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